Note: The following transcript was generated using AI and may contain inaccuracies.
This is another episode, a seat at the table. I have two special guests with me today insha'Allah.
They're going to introduce themselves and their age insha'Allah and the topic that we're going to talk about insha'Allah. So introduce yourself. My name is Muhammad, I am 10 years old.
Both of you, today insha'Allah the topic that we're going to be discussing together is relationship. The relationship insha'Allah that we're going to be talking about is what? Between your parents and your siblings. So before we start, I want you guys to insha'Allah introduce this topic for me.
Let's start with the parents. The relationship that you have with your parents, how important is it? Okay, so you need to obey them, you need to do whatever they tell you to do unless it is going against Allah's orders. Wow, that's good.
So the first thing that we want to know is that you have to listen to your parents, your mother and your father. That is unrestricted or is it restricted? You insha'Allah mentioned it is restricted. If they say do something which is haram, then we don't listen to them.
But even then, do we be disrespectful to them? No, we have to be kind in a manner and say it. We have to say it in good manners, in a very nice way. That's why Allah said in the ayah, Allah says if they strive, your parents, they strive, they exert effort to make you do that which is wrong, like shirk, disobey Allah.
They try their hardest, right? Allah said, don't obey your mom or your dad. But then look what Allah said after that, but be friends with them. Even though they are not telling you to do something good, Allah is still telling us that we can't disconnect ourselves from them.
We have to still be connected with them, right? Did he reveal this ayah at the time of Musa'ab ibn Umair or did Allah reveal it? Allahumma al-bari, an amazing question, masha'Allah. So this ayah came down on a noble companion, Sa'd ibn Abi Waqas. Sa'd ibn Abi Waqas' mother, she strove so much to make Sa'd leave Islam.
When she heard that Sa'd took Islam and he accepted Islam, Sa'd was a very good boy to his mother. He was very respectful to his mother. And so what she wanted to do was, she wanted to make him leave the religion of Islam.
So she said to him, I am going to starve myself and I'm going to sit in the sun. The sun's going to burn me and I'm going to starve and I'm not going to eat. And everyone is going to say that is Sa'd's mother sitting there, Sa'd disrespected his mother, Sa'd wasn't nice to his mother.
So then he said to his mother, mom, I'm never going to leave this religion. I'm never going to leave Islam. I'm going to be a Muslim for the rest of my life, insha'Allah.
So if you are going to sit in the sun and if you're going to starve, you're going to only hurt yourself, mom. So don't do that to yourself. So when his mother realized how serious he was and that he is not going to leave the religion of Islam, she came back home and she felt fit.
So that's what the ayah came down on. But look at him. He didn't disrespect his mother.
He didn't shout at her. He didn't boycott his mother. He still was good towards his mother.
So why is it, why are parents very important? What's the reason they're very important? Because your mother gave birth to you. And your father and mother take care of you. They take care of you.
They give you a shelter over your head. A shelter over your head. Have you ever seen a newborn baby, brand new, spanky new baby? Are the babies strong? Can they walk? Can they talk? No.
So what does the mother and father do? They take care of him. They take care of that child? If the parent just takes the child and throws him in a rubbish bin, can the child help himself? No. So the parents have chosen to take care of you.
They chose to feed you. They chose to make you wear good clothing, right? Once you grow up and you become strong, you start to have a brain. You're able to talk and you're able to walk and you're able to, is it fair that you forget them and disrespect them? Is it good? No.
It's not good. Someone who, like if you both stand up and you look how far you are from the ground, who's the one who made you rise from the ground that far? Your parents. Your parents.
They're the ones who love you the most. Your mother or father love you the most. More than even your friends.
Even more than your friends. It's your parents. That's why if your friends tell you to do something and your parents tell you to do something, who should you listen to? Your parents.
Because who's the one who's really caring for you every day, feeding you, putting you to sleep, hugging you? Who is it? Your parents. Like example, you want to do arts and crafts and you want to use the scissors but your parents said don't use the scissors but your friend says use the scissors, then you should listen to your parents. Because when Allah is so true, you should.
Your parents are looking out for you. They don't have, oh I'm going to put myself first. Who are they looking out for? Us.
They're looking out for you. Your well-being. They're looking out for your progression.
They're looking out for where you're going to be in the future. See, me, my children are the only people who I want them to pass me. Everyone else is a competition.
But if my children pass me and they become better than me, it's like, okay, no problem. Parents love their children even more than themselves. Especially who's the bigger one? Mom or dad? Who has more rights in Islam? Mom.
How many times? Three times. Your mother's got three times rights. Why is it the mother? Because she gives birth to you.
She's the one who takes care of you like the most. She had you in the womb for nine months and also she has Jannah for you. The Prophet ﷺ, he told us in a hadith, when the man came to him, he said, Who is the person who's most deserving of my companionship? Who should I be the most closest to? The Prophet ﷺ said to the man, Then the man said, after that, the Prophet ﷺ said, The man said, after that, the Prophet ﷺ said what? The third time.
And then the man said, after that, who? And then he said what? Your father. So the father was when? The fourth. The reason is because the mother, the child is inside her tummy, right? For how many months? Nine.
Nine months. That child that's in her stomach for nine months, he's eating her food. He's living on her.
Allah says in the Qur'an, Your mother, she's carrying you. She can't sleep properly when you're in the stomach. You being in the stomach makes it very uncomfortable for her to sleep.
At night she wakes up three, four, five times because she can't sleep properly. She can't walk. But sometimes she can't even sleep.
She can't even sleep. Sometimes she can't eat food. Okay.
Then once you come out after nine months, do you let her go and do what she wants? What do you do to her? But what do we do to her? We'll, she breastfeeds us for another two years. And that breastfeeding, all that milk is again, you're taking it from her, her food. You're taking it from her energy.
You're taking it from her body. So all of that is affecting her. That's why the mother grows old, tired, fragile.
She becomes weak. The father on the other hand, not me, maybe he's here. He's sleeping for the nine months.
And then in two months, when the mother's breastfeeding, he's really not there all the time, is he? Yeah. But he's doing something else, which is very good. What's he doing? He's earning the money.
He's a breadwinner. He's bringing the money into the house. But that isn't as big as the father.
The mother is more bigger. And that's why Allah chose the mother. Yes.
Those two parents are the ones that they sacrifice everything for you. They cut away from their friends. They leave everyone else.
They don't even enjoy themselves. And sometimes they also have to cut their own desires. Like example, someone likes coke, but they can't have it.
That's true. Sometimes they, they look at the food and they say, okay, you have it. Because you, they wanted to eat something and you say, ma, ma, I want it, I want it, I want it.
They take it from themselves just for you. So you realize how important your parents are. When you what? When you grow older and you have your own children.
And you look at your children and what you do for them, the sacrifices that you do. That's when you start appreciating your mother and your father. When you see your wife carrying a child for nine months, you realize parents are very important.
Even when you grow older and you become 30, 40, you still, they're still there to take care of you. They're still there to support you. They always want your progression.
They always want you to be high. What about your siblings? You won't cry at Muhammad. No.
Your relationship with siblings, how should it be handled? Like example, if they trouble you so much, you should still stay strong. Like you should still stay strong and you should not like hit them or something. You should explain to them.
Sometimes throw a pillow at them. No. Also like they should be your like best friend, even more than any other friend.
That's true. Again, the second thing is you see your siblings are either older than you or younger than you. If they are older than you, what should you do? Respect.
Respect your elders. But if they're younger than you, you have to be what? Merciful to them. Kind.
So your elder brothers and sisters, you have to be what? Respectful to them. The ones that are younger than you, you have to be what? Merciful and kind to them. Don't suffocate them in sleep.
What do you have to do? Be kind and merciful to your youngsters and the ones that are younger than you. If there's something you have, sometimes sacrifice it for them. I'll give it to you.
Your older brothers and sisters, if they tell you to do something, listen. The Prophet ﷺ, he said, لَيْسَ مِنَّا is not from a maqsas. The one who doesn't respect his eldest and what? And does not show mercy to the younger ones.
And what if the younger one does not respect you, then what you should do? Hamza's got a question. Exactly, merciful. Merciful as in, even if they do something bad, they trouble you, then you should always be kind.
You see, this is something I want you to remember, Hamza, okay? Other people's actions should not determine your response. Shall I break that down for you? The way that the people are to you and the way that the people deal with you and the way that they do things to you, shouldn't control the way you respond. You should always respond with what? The way Allah and His Messenger ﷺ. If someone angers you, makes you angry, what should you do? Those who restrain their anger, hold it back.
When they're angry, you can't even tell they're angry. They might even smile and they're angry. They hide their anger.
And they forgive their people. So to forgive is always the best. But if you do what you're right, you think, you know what? This person's not being nice to me.
Never take matters into your own hands. What should you do? Take it to your parents. Snitch.
Say, Mommy, Daddy, my older brother is doing this to me. My younger brother is doing this to me. And they will solve the situation, right? Yes.
They say, snitches get put in stitches, right? Have you heard that? Yes, snitches get stitches. So who snitches in the family? The younger ones. They always snitch everything that's happening in the house.
I'll tell you guys a funny story. My youngest sister, someone in my family, we were playing in the house. My mother went, so she left us with someone.
But what we did was, the auntie that was left with us, I think she went to sleep or something. Anyways, we were playing. And our house phone, the house phone, it's locked.
So you can't call anyone. You can only have incoming calls. Outgoing calls are not working because my mother, she put something on it, a password or something.
So the only people you can call is who? 999. So you call the 999, you call the police. The police are like, who's this? You put the phone down.
If you put the phone down and you call the police, what happens? And then like, they think there's an emergency. So they come rushing at the house, right? Yes. They can track you? Of course.
They have a tracker. They have a tracker. They know the house that the phone came from, right? And is the police phone line ever busy? No.
Is it ever busy? Yes. It's an emergency line, so it can never be busy. So they picked up.
They said, who do you want? They put the phone down. So they sent a police over. And the police came over.
My auntie was sleeping. My mother was out. So my oldest sister said, oh, it's fine.
Nothing's happening. They said, oh, is it real? They looked around and they realized nothing was happening. So they left.
So we sat down amongst ourselves. We said, look, if we tell mom what just happened, she's going to get really angry. Let's not say anything.
Everyone be quiet. OK? Hush, hush. Silence.
We don't want to get in trouble. That was the agreement that we had. OK? So my little sister was sitting there.
She nodded. She said, OK. We told her, please don't say anything.
Don't say anything. So my mother came home. My mom came home.
My oldest sister, me, and my other siblings, nobody said nothing. And an hour went by. My youngest sister said, mom, no one called the police today.
No one called the police. I'm like, what do you mean? No one called the police. The police did not come to the house.
We did not call the police when that happened. Oh, no. So she was the snitch in the family.
She was the snitch. So the relationship that the siblings have, it should be what? Like, kind of like, like a truce. Like, it should be like, always, like, we should always be like.
Like peace, yes. Yeah. So forgiveness is the first thing you do.
You forgive. And the second thing you should work towards is what? If you feel like, no, I'm upset. I'm not happy.
I really want to stop. And then you tell your parents. Yes.
When you grow older, some people stop talking to their siblings. They no longer talk to their siblings. They grow apart.
And they don't call each other. They're angry with each other. They're happy against each other.
Are those people doing something good? No. Allah says in the Quran. Stick up your hands.
Stick up your hand. Okay, your four fingers and your thumb. Are they the same size? Do they look the same? No.
Are they the same? None. Okay, different, right? Yeah. But they all come from the same palm.
You and your siblings are all different. You all came from the same parents, but you're all different. So those differences should not push you apart.
It should bring you together, right? Just like your fingers are all on one palm, but they all come back to. Sometimes you bite yourself, right? Does your tongue say, no, I'm not going to stay here. I'm going to leave.
Does it say that? So sometimes you and your siblings, there might be a little issue, a little fracture. Your brother might do something bad to you. You might do something bad to your brother, right? What do you do? Forget it.
We're brothers. We shouldn't fight. I love you.
You love me. She's always, me and my brother used to fight a lot when we were young. I was always strongest.
He might disagree with that, but there's always been love. To be honest, the funny thing is we used to fight the most because we love each other. The two siblings that fight the most, shout at each other the most, are the ones that love each other the most.
Like example, you go first, like it out of the door. Then you say, no, you go first like that. Allah, yeah, you go first.
Give it priority. Have respect for your elders, your elder brothers and sisters, and the ones who are younger than you. Be very kind and merciful.
Remember everything you say and everything that you do. What you want from it is to get it closer to Allah Ta'ala for Allah to love you. See, do we do bad things? Do we sometimes do things that are naughty? Yeah.
Do we want our parents to forgive us? Yes. Do we want Allah to forgive us? Yes. So that we should forgive others.
When somebody does something to us that we don't like, we should remember that we also like to be forgiven, so that we should be giving others forgiveness, right? Okay, let's conclude with a few points now. The people who are the most closest to you are your parents and your siblings. They're your blood.
They're the ones you've grown up with. Wherever you go, you come back to them. Where do they go with you? They go with you.
You have the same father, the same mother, or the same mother, or the same father. It doesn't matter. They're your siblings.
You share blood, right? Have that place for them. Even if you disagree with them, even if you don't see eye to eye with them with ease, respect them as your siblings. Allah gave them that, right? There was a great scholar of our time.
His name was Shaykh Abdul Razzaq Al-Nusayn Al-Abad. He was a shaykh in the late 50s, early 60s, or mid-60s maybe even. So he was invited to come to the UAE, right? He was invited to come to the UAE to give a lecture, to teach classes, and last minute, the shaykh cancelled.
He said, I'm not going to come. He said, I can't come. But was he in the UAE at that time? No, he lived in Saudi Arabia.
Last minute, he said, I'm not able to come. So when they asked him, why can't you come? He said, my mother doesn't allow me to, or my mother asked me not to, or my parents asked me not to. He's 60.
Who is he listening to? His father and mother. His father and mother. So even when you become older, don't say, oh, I know what I'm doing.
Please don't tell me what I'm doing. Stop telling me what to do. If your parents cook you food and you don't like it, what should you do? The Prophet ﷺ was never given food, except that he what? He ate it.
He ate it if he liked it. And if he didn't like it, he would what? He would not say anything bad about it. But he ate it though.
If he couldn't eat it and he didn't like it, he wouldn't eat it. But you don't say anything bad about your parents' food. You're never ungrateful to them.
Why are you doing this? It's not fair. My friend so-and-so has this. I want it as well.
That's not a good thing, is it? Because your parents might not have that money. They might not have that money. They may be trying their hardest to provide for you food to eat and a shelter, a roof over your head.
They might not be able to give you that, which your friend has, for example. And if they did have that money, they would have given it to you. So you're making them feel sad that you're sad.
If you would ever give your parents a gift, what would it be? Like to memorize the Qur'an and then they can have that crown on the Day of Judgment. What about you? I was going to say that too. To memorize the Qur'an, right? To be a righteous child.
I think that's the biggest gift your parents would ever want from you is for you to be a righteous child. I really love you two, Inshallah Ta'ala. You two are very smart and clever young lads.
Thank you. May Allah preserve you both. Make you guys scholars.
Thank you. And a wolf to your parents. We're going to end there, Inshallah Ta'ala, with this episode.
Anything we've said wrong, mistakes, shortcomings, is from us and Shaytan and Allah and His Messenger are both free from it. Subhanaka Allahumma wa bihamdihi wa shahadu an la ilaha illa Allah wa astaghfiruka wa atubu ilayh.
