Answer: In response to your question, what you first of all have to understand, my beloved brother, is that it's not permissible in the Sharia for a man to shake the hand of any woman that isn't his mahram. Whether that woman is young, or she's old, or it's behind a cloth, or if it's directly shaking her hand without any cloth between you and her, all of that doesn't change the ruling.
Whether she's young, or old, or elderly, or whether it's between you and her, a veil between you and her when you shake her hand, you place a handkerchief in your hand, for example, or she's wearing gloves, or you're wearing gloves, it doesn't change the ruling, it remains impermissible.
Evidence from the Hadith
The Prophet ﷺ told us in a hadith:
Al-Imam Al-Tabarani narrated in his Al-Mu‘jam Al-Kabeer, from the hadith of Ma‘qal ibn Yasār رضي الله عنه, and Shaykh Al-Albani رحمه الله graded this hadith to be sahih:
لَأَن يُطْعَنَ فِي رَأْسِ أَحَدِكُمْ بِمِخْيَطٍ مِنْ حَدِيدٍ خَيْرٌ لَهُ مِنْ أَن يَمَسَّ امْرَأَةً لَا تَحِلُّ لَهُ
For a man to be struck in the head with an iron needle is better for him than to touch a woman who is not lawful for him. [Al-Mu‘jam al-Kabīr 487]
That shows how serious this is. The Prophet ﷺ in that hadith did not distinguish between whether she's young or old, and he didn't distinguish whether there's a veil or not.
The Prophet’s ﷺ Example
Even the Prophet ﷺ never used to do bay‘ah (pledge of allegiance) with women by shaking their hands as he did with the men. He would take their pledge of allegiance by speaking to them ﷺ.
ʿĀʾishah رضي الله عنها said:
وَاللَّهِ مَا مَسَّتْ يَدُ رَسُولِ اللَّهِ ﷺ يَدَ امْرَأَةٍ قَطُّ غَيْرَ أَنَّهُ يُبَايِعَهُنَّ بِالْكَلَامِ
By Allah, the Messenger’s hand never touched the hand of any woman whatsoever, except that he would give them the pledge of allegiance by words only. [Sahih al-Bukhari 5288]
It has also been transmitted that when a woman extended her hand to the Prophet ﷺ, he said:
إِنِّى لَا أُصَافِحُ النِّسَاءَ
I do not shake hands with women. [Sunan Ibn Majah 2874]
So if a woman tries to shake your hand, you respond by saying as the Prophet ﷺ did:
إِنِّى لَا أُصَافِحُ النِّسَاءَ
I do not shake hands with women.
The Reason and Wisdom
Touching the hand of a woman is worse than looking at her because it moves one’s desires far greatly than just looking at her. It causes fitnah to arise through physical contact.
The Prophet ﷺ said:
مَا تَرَكْتُ بَعْدِى فِتْنَةً أَضَرَّ عَلَى الرِّجَالِ مِنَ النِّسَاءِ
I have not left behind me any fitnah more harmful to men than women. [Sahih al-Bukhari 5096]
And he ﷺ also said:
إِنَّ الدُّنْيَا حُلْوَةٌ خَضِرَةٌ وَإِنَّ اللَّهَ مُسْتَخْلِفَكُمْ فِيهَا فَيَنْظُرُ كَيْفَ تَعْمَلُونَ فَاتَّقُوا الدُّنْيَا وَاتَّقُوا النِّسَاءَ فَإِنَّ أَوَّلَ فِتْنَةِ بَنِى إِسْرَائِيلَ كَانَتْ فِى النِّسَاءِ
This world is sweet and green, and Allah has made you successors therein to see how you act. So beware of this world and beware of women, for the first trial of the Children of Israel was through women. [Sahih Muslim 2742]
The Principle of Blocking the Means
This issue leads to zina (fornication), and in our religion, anything that leads to haram becomes haram itself, because:
ما أدى إلى حرام فهو حرام
Whatever leads to the unlawful is itself unlawful.
The means (wasā’il) take the ruling of the ends (maqāṣid).
Refutation of Weak Reports
As for the claim that Abu Bakr رضي الله عنه during his caliphate would go out to the tribes and shake hands with women, this is weak.
Imam al-Zaylaʿi in Nasr al-Rāyah found this strange and said it doesn’t seem right.
Al-Hafiz Ibn Hajar al-‘Asqalani in al-Dirāyah said:
لم أجده
I did not find any basis for it.
Similarly, the narration that the Prophet ﷺ would shake hands with women from beneath a cloth is also weak and has no basis, as clarified by Shaykh al-Albani رحمه الله in Silsilat al-Ahadith as-Sahihah.
Giving Salām to Women
As for greeting women, if there is no fear of fitnah and there is a genuine need, then it is permissible.
Abu Dawud and al-Tirmidhi narrated (the wording is from al-Tirmidhi), and Ibn Majah also narrated, from Asma’ bint Yazid رضي الله عنها:
The Prophet ﷺ passed by the masjid one day and there was a group of women sitting. He raised his hand to greet them. [Jami' at-Tirmidhi 2697]
Also, Umm Hani رضي الله عنها said:
I went to the Prophet ﷺ on the day of the conquest (of Makkah) and found him bathing while Fatimah was shielding him. I greeted him, and he replied, “Who is this?” I said, “I am Umm Hani, the daughter of Abu Talib.” He said, “Welcome, Umm Hani.” [Sahih al-Bukhari 357]
This shows that greeting a woman with salām is permissible.
Likewise, Sahl ibn Sa‘d رضي الله عنه said:
We had an elderly woman who would serve us. After Jumu‘ah prayer, we would go and greet her. [Sahih al-Bukhari 6248]
So it’s permissible to give salām to women, but haram to touch them when doing so.
Additional Supporting Evidence
When Jibril عليه السلام, the angel, would come to the Prophet ﷺ, he would always appear in the form of a man, never a woman.
In Bukhari and Muslim, from ʿĀʾishah رضي الله عنها:
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: “O ʿĀʾishah, this is Jibril conveying salām to you.”
She replied: “Peace and mercy be upon him. You see what we do not see, O Messenger of Allah.” [Sahih al-Bukhari 3217]
This shows that even Jibril عليه السلام never appeared in the form of a woman, because it is not permissible for a man to touch or shake hands with a woman.
Conclusion
A man should not touch the body or hand of a woman who is not his mahram under any circumstances. The Prophet ﷺ himself refrained, and the Sharia has clearly prohibited it, regardless of age, context, or the presence of a barrier.
— Answered by Ustadh Abdulrahman Hassan
